ABC Upfronts: Laughing all the way to the bank?
ABC is a funny network. In the early 90s it was the epicenter of the lousy-but-popular sitcom boom. NBC eventually edged it out with quality, but that period of time after The Cosby Show lost relevance and before Seinfeld and Friends exploded, ABC is what people watched when they wanted to laugh. Home Improvement was the Emmy favorite (as well as a favorite in the Pecoraro household), but as an 11 year old in 1991, it seemed that TGIF and its crop of non-threatening family comedies was all anyone ever talked about (I ran with a pretty hip crowd).
Those years are obviously long gone. Audiences want drama instead of comedy on their television sets, which is why I wasn’t shocked yesterday when NBC announced only one new comedy was being greenlit (as of now it doesn’t even have a home on the network). ABC seems to be holding out hope that audiences will eventually want to laugh again, explaining why the network has picked up four new comedies (of course it only renewed one of its existing crop, and no, it wasn’t According to Jim). The full breakdown is available after the jump…
ABC’s upfront presentation was held Tuesday afternoon at Alice Tully Hall in New York’s Lincoln Center. Entertainment president, Stephen McPherson, said the following:
“We’re heading into the new season with a strong lineup of returning shows that we’ve developed and nurtured over the past few years. That solid foundation will help us launch an exciting development slate as we continue our forward momentum this fall. We’re dedicated to working hard week after week to deliver the best stories and most memorable characters on TV.”
The English language never sounds sweeter than when it’s pulled from a press-release.
ABC, as a whole, is in good pretty good shape. Since the launch of Desperate Housewives and Lost almost four years ago, the network has slowly built a crop of successes and in the process branded itself (rightly, I’d argue) as an alternative to CBS’s doom-and-gloom cop-dramas. Each season since, the network has added a one significant new series within a group of otherwise forgettable attempts at filling out a schedule.
ABC’s biggest problem isn’t finding breakout hits. They have those. ABC’s problem is finding those moderate successes that can fill out a lineup. They need the equivalent of NBC’s Law & Order franchise – a group of programs that are cost efficient in production and draw enough viewers to get renewed (interestingly, the cost of the original Law & Order is what put it on the chopping block last month despite making it out in tact). In other words, they need more Boston Legal and not necessarily more Grey’s Anatomy (not like they’d turn down the latter, but how often does lightening strike?).
Take for example the networks new Wednesday night line-up comprised of three brand new dramas. Risky seems to be an understatement.
All that being said, the network has renewed five shows that premiered over the past year, compared with three at NBC. The show include Ugly Betty (which remains in its Thursday time period), Men in Trees (moving up to 8pm on Fridays), Brothers & Sisters, Notes From The Underbelly (shockingly!) and October Road (the last two programs will eventually replace Dancing with the Stars and The Bachelor after their fall seasons).
ABC is picking up roughly the same number of shows as it had last season: seven dramas and four comedies (compared with five last year).
OK. Enough dilly-dally, let’s get to the lineup.
| MONDAY 8:00 p.m. Dancing with the Stars 9:30 p.m. Sam I Am (new comedy series) 10:00 p.m. The Bachelor |
Monday is owned by ABC, much to my own confusion. I kind of get The Bachelor and all of its contrived romantic entanglements but I will never understand Dancing with the Stars. Still, America seems to get it and that’s really all that matters. What’s curious is the placement of Sam I Am between the two reality strongholds. In theory this makes sense because it guarantees a decent number for an unknown shown. In practice, seeing one comedy nestled between two known shows just looks odd.
I’d like to think that this will work. Why, after all, do we always insist on comedies being paired together (the 30-minute thing probably has something to do with it). I guess my biggest qualm with the night is that Sam I Am sounds god-awful. I suppose only time will tell. |
| TUESDAY: 8:00 p.m. Cavemen (new comedy series) 8:30 p.m. Carpoolers (new comedy series) 9:00 p.m. Dancing with the Stars the Results Show 10:00 p.m. Boston Legal |
Obviously the biggest question marks are Cavemen and Carpoolers. Dancing and Boston Legal have their viewers and probably won’t lose any between now and then (unless there’s some sort of Dancing/Boston Legal Convention and the roof “accidentally†caves in leaving scores of television fans afraid of roofs and thus unable to watch indoor television – the most common type of television).
Cavemen is the issue here. Early reviews [ed note: the previous linked column contains numerous exclamation points] say it is absolutely unwatchable. Can a comedy series based on a set of commercials really be that bad? Better question: why not just program 30 minutes of Geico commercials in this time period each week? |
| WEDNESDAY: 8:00 p.m. Pushing Daisies (new drama series) 9:00 p.m. Private Practice (new drama series) 10:00 p.m. Dirty Sexy Money (new drama series) |
You might notice something about ABC’s Wednesday night line-up. Look hard. There’s a pattern there. Can you see it. Here, I’ll just tell you: all of those shows are brand-spanking-new and untested.
Now, a lot of cynics will say that audiences are idiots and need to be talked down to. I don’t subscribe to this theory. Still, audiences need a reason to tune in and it seems almost impossible to convince a large mass of people to check out any of the three NEW shows on a night without giving them a reason to check things out. This problem can be solved with the right mix of promotion, but still, its hard enough to promo one new show. The irony is that two of these new series Pushing Daisies and Dirty Sexy Money look quite interesting and worth my time (at least initially). My prediction: if the current arrangement stays either all of these shows hit or none of them hit. |
| THURSDAY: 8:00 p.m. Ugly Betty 9:00 p.m. Grey’s Anatomy 10:00 p.m. Big Shots (new drama series) |
ABC and CBS can duke it out all they want for viewers on Thursday night, but I think we all know that ABC owns the water-cooler on Friday morning. Ugly Betty and Grey’s Anatomy, barring a complete collapse on the part of the writers, are going to remain strong and will be keeping most — if not all — of their audiences.
The best timeslot on television is at 10pm on ABC after Grey’s Anatomy. Aside from The Nine (a good show that was never fully realized, on at the wrong time), every show that has premiered in that timeslot has succeeded. October Road, Men in Trees, Traveler(???)… more? As long as Big Shots doesn’t star ugly people (Betty excluding), I predict it to go over quite well. |
| FRIDAY: 8:00 p.m. MEN IN TREES 9:00 p.m. Women’s Murder Club (new drama series) 10:00 p.m. 20/20 |
Friday is such a toss-up, it’s hard to say what’ll happen. We all ready know Men In Trees (is this suppose to be all caps since it references a construction sign?) is successful enough and Women’s Murder Club sounds like good fun on a Friday, so why not? If anything, the original programming ends just in time for the viewer to flip over to NBC to watch Friday Night Lights instead of gawking as Stossel’s ’stache. |
| SATURDAY: 8:00 p.m. Saturday Night College Football |
Football. I wonder if anyone will watch? I mean, do people still care about this stuff? I mean, really, football? Nice, ABC. Real nice. Way to be “with it.” |
| SUNDAY: 7:00 p.m. America’s Funniest Home Videos 8:00 p.m. Extreme Makeover: Home Edition 9:00 p.m. Desperate Housewives 10:00 p.m. Brothers & Sisters |
This is really what a network wants. They want to look at a particular night, while designing their new schedule, and say, “Yeah, Sunday, looks good… next.”
It’s kind of a brilliant line-up, really. Each series is different from the next though with enough similarity to carry an viewer to the next program. Good for you, ABC. Well played. |
The New Shows:
Big Shots
What they say: This is the story of four friends at the top of their game…until the women in their lives enter the room. Lines between boardroom and bedroom blur when these competitive but dysfunctional CEOs take refuge in their friendship, discussing business, confiding secrets, seeking advice and supporting each other through life’s surprising twists and turns.
What I say: Four friends, eh? Bedroom and boardroom? Sounds like a network television extravaganza! I can’t wait to meet “the slacker” and “the workaholic.” Honestly, I feel like Big Shots could have easily been called, Generic Male Romance Series Following Grey’s, and honestly, I’m OK with that. It beats police procedurals, right?
Odds of survival: 4:1
strong>What they say: Four ambitious and sexy women, who’ve been best friends since business school, try to balance their glamorous and demanding careers with their complex personal lives in the city that never sleeps. They’ve created their own “boys club” to protect each other and discuss their ups and downs as they try to have it all. What good is it to break the glass ceiling without girlfriends to share in your success?
What I say: Wait a minute, wasn’t this show presented yesterday by NBC as The Lipstick Jungle? The answer is yes. The only difference that I can tell is that Lucy Liu is in this one and that Darren Star is the executive producer. The problem with both of these shows, as I see it, is that the former Sex and the City audience doesn’t want a new Sex and the City, they want the old Sex and the City and neither one is Sex in the City. They’re something else. Something similar, but something else.
Odds of survival: 8:1
Dirty Sexy Money
What they say: Some people say money is the root of all evil. They may be right. Nick George’s whole life has been lived in the shadow of the Darling family, but as an adult he’s leading the perfect life as an idealistic lawyer, until his father’s suspicious death. The absurdly wealthy Darlings of New York have asked him to take over his father’s job as their personal lawyer, but the money that will allow him the freedom to be an altruistic do-gooder is only part of the picture. That same money pulls him into the dubious doings of the Darling clan. Power, privilege and family money are a volatile cocktail.
What I say: This show is going to be really great. I say this because it stars Peter Krause. This show is also going to be a big hit (if people find it on Wednesday night) because it takes a serial drama and puts it into the parameters of a procedural. It’s also EP’d by Bryan Singer, a man whose only sin has been a somewhat ‘eh’ Superman movie. Another reason you can expect it to succeed is that it’s being produced by ABC Studios, which means the network has the most to gain from it connecting with an audience. Expect to see lots and LOTS of promos over the summer.
Odds of survival: 3:1
strong>What they say: Many lawyers consider themselves prophets, but Eli Stone may be the real deal. Eli has built a successful career at a top law firm in San Francisco representing only the biggest and richest corporations that make a habit of screwing over the little guy. But after experiencing a series of odd hallucinations, Eli seeks to find a deeper meaning to life while trying not to lose his job and destroy his relationship with the bosses’ daughter. When Eli discovers an aneurysm in his brain, he wonders if his condition is truly medical or if perhaps he now has a higher calling.
What I say: First of all, is San Francisco the new Chicago? Second, if ABC is going to be the Lawyer version of CBS’s Crime-time, fine. If not, they’ve really got to dump this completely generic high-concept drama. Victor Garber is in it. I suspect he’ll play a gruff fatherly figure.
Odds of survival: 13:1
Private Practice
What they say: From Shonda Rhimes, the Golden Globe-winning creator of “Grey’s Anatomy,” comes a story about new beginnings and old friends. Addison Forbes Montgomery is a renowned neonatal surgeon, respected by her friends and colleagues at Seattle Grace Hospital. Deciding she can no longer healthily co-exist with her ex-husband, McDreamy, and her ex-lover, McSteamy, Addison heads to Los Angeles for sunnier weather and happier possibilities. Reunited with her once-married, newly divorced medical school friends, Naomi and Sam, Addison joins their chic private practice. Featuring an all-star cast including Kate Walsh, Amy Brenneman, Tim Daly and Taye Diggs, “Private Practice” tells the story of a woman unafraid of change and willing to begin a new life.
What I say: See our review from last week.
Odds of survival: 3:2
strong>What they say: From Bryan Fuller (”Heroes”) and Barry Sonnenfeld (”Men in Black”) comes an unprecedented blend of romance, crime procedural and high-concept fantasy in a forensic fairytale about a young man with a very special gift. Once upon a time, a mild-mannered boy named Ned realized he could touch dead things and bring them back to life. Grown-up Ned puts his ability to good use, not only touching dead fruit and making it ripe with everlasting flavor, but working with an investigator to crack murder cases by asking the deceased to name their killers. But the tale gets complicated, as all tales do, when Ned brings his childhood sweetheart, Chuck, back from the dead and keeps her alive. Chuck encourages him to use his power to help others, instead of merely solving mysteries and collecting the rewards. Life would be perfect for Ned and Chuck, except for one cruel twist: If he ever touches her again, she’ll go back to being dead, this time for good.
What I say: What? This seems to be the craziest idea I’ve read about all week. It also might be the best. With all of the focus at ABC placed on dramas that appeal largely to women, I think a lot of people have forgotten that the network also houses one of the most bizarre series on television anywhere in Lost. Pushing Daisies seems to be a natural fit with Lost and would be a much better lead-in than whatever they’ve tried over the past three years. Pushing Daisies has the procedural elements that network television executives love and yet all of this bringing people back to life and magic powers and crime and romance and twists sound like a show people might be too mystified by not to watch. Or it could be a complete disaster. Either way I’ll be watching.
Odds of survival: 7:1
Women’s Murder Club
What they say: Based on James Patterson’s bestselling novels, The Women’s Murder Club, four working women in San Francisco - a detective, a district attorney, a medical examiner and a reporter - use their expertise and unique talents to solve murder cases. Each woman is successful in her own field, but because of their unique friendship, they realize that pooling their resources during investigations leads to undiscovered clues and answers in both work and their personal lives.
What I say: Call me crazy, but this sounds like a pretty great idea (I’m actually surprised it’s based on a series of books, as it couldn’t sound more television-y). Should be a good fit with Men In Trees and if I were ever home on a Friday evening with a bowl of Chunky Monkey while wearing footie-pajamas, I’d definitely give it a shot.
Odds of survival: 5:2
strong>What they say: Less about saving the environment than male bonding, four guys from very different backgrounds relish their daily commute as they commiserate about their lives, jobs and families in the carpool lane. There’s Laird, the recently divorced playboy; Aubrey, the timid homemaker and breadwinner; the conservative and traditional Gracen; and eager newlywed Dougie. Together, between the pressures of home and work, these men find time to be themselves while driving to and from the office.
What I say: I might have been one of a dozen people on the planet who liked Sons and Daughters (a show that gracelessly, though charmingly, tried to copy the magic of Arrested Development) so the presence of Fred Goss in the lead in Carpoolers is at the very least intriguing. We have workplace comedies. We have family comedies. Why not a comedy about that curious in-between time. Why not, I say! Kids in the Hall’s Bruce McCulloch EP’s the series, so at least there are some capable hands at work here (though didn’t he also direct the film “Dog Park”?).
Odds of survival: 8:1
Cavemen
Cavemen
What they say: Cavemen is a unique buddy comedy that offers a clever twist on stereotypes and turns race relations on their head. Inspired by the popular Geico Insurance commercials, the series looks at life through the eyes of the ultimate outsiders - three modern cavemen - as they struggle to find their place in the world. Joel, his cynical best friend, Nick, and easy-going little brother, Jamie, are contemporary cavemen who live in the suburban south and simply want to be treated like ordinary thirty-something guys. Despite their attempts at assimilation, Nick doesn’t believe mainstream society will ever completely accept them, Jamie seems to take it all in stride and Joel straddles the middle, torn between his friends, his more traditional values and his loving fiance.
What I say: OK, we all thought it was pretty funny a few months back when we heard about ABC shooting a pilot based on the Geico cavemen. We had a good laugh, talked about how we’d all tune in, and loved the fact that we live in a world where such a thing could actually take place. Well, now we do live in that world and we have to come to terms with the fact that this show will actually be on the air and that none of us really want to watch it. Luckily for the American populace, no one is holding a gun to our heads… yet. Now we know to be careful what we wish for.
Odds of survival: 50:1
strong>What they say: Having navigated the awkward and sometimes traumatic world of high school, Rebecca Freely returns to her alma mater as a guidance counselor, free of the insecurities and orthodontia of her school days. Amidst student behavioral problems and the persistent romantic advances of the male nurse, Gary, Rebecca is certain of one thing - she is interested in the hot auto-shop-turned-Spanish-teacher, Tim. However, much as in high school days of unexpected teenage angst, Lisa, a former cheerleader and nemesis of Rebecca’s, returns as the new English teacher determined to make Rebecca relive her unpopular past, setting sights on Tim as well.
What I say: Judy “The Last Time You’ll See These” Greer, stars in this new comedy. Judy is such a likable presence, I can’t help but think the show could work. Plus, you really can’t go wrong with a comedy set in a school, in my opinion, as we’ve all been there and we all know the set-up. Also good: adults acting like children. Now, none of this is suggesting that Miss/Guided (which has the type of title that suggests fifteen people spent a week around a writer’s table coming up with it) will be any good, but I’d wager it has the best shot of all the comedies on ABC (and would probably fit best with Notes from the Underbelly it’s only returning comedy.
Odds of survival: 5:2
Sam I Am
What they say: When a terrible accident leaves Samantha “Sam” Newly in a coma for eight days, she wakes up with no recollection of any past experiences, memories or events. Faced with amnesia, Sam must start over. To her dismay she discovers that she wasn’t a particularly honest, good-hearted or loving person. In fact she was self-involved, narcissistic and devoid of real relationships - essentially a bitch. Sam must now struggle with her desire to be good and her temptation to be…not so good. Finding the line between good and evil is never easy.
What I say: I refuse to watch a show based entirely on amnesia. Really, has anyone, anywhere, ever actually had amnesia? I’m sure the answer is yes, but I’m also sure most of those people could fit in my apartment (and if you’ve been in my apartment you understand that said number has to be quite low). Look, everyone loves Christina Applegate, but it seems like she’d be much better suited for a show called Everybody Loves Christina Applegate.
Odds of survival: 18:1
strong>What they say: The first primetime series from Harpo Productions centers on the competition, drama and emotion as millions of dollars are given away to make a difference in people’s lives across the country. Each week contestants will face a “big twist” that will test their nerve, drive, ingenuity and passion. Big name stars will turn up throughout the series to join the “Oprah’s Big Give” tour. During the eight episodes filmed in various U.S. cities, the field will be narrowed. The stakes will get higher and higher, with one person ultimately being chosen as The Biggest Giver. “Oprah’s Big Give” is created and produced by Harpo Productions in conjunction with Profiles Television Productions, LLC. Oprah Winfrey, Ellen Rakieten, Harriet Seitler, Jonathan Sinclair, Bertram van Munster and Elise Doganieri are executive producers.
What I say: I’m not an avid Oprah watcher, but when I do watch, I tend to like it (or as much as a guy can enjoy watching a show about how to buy jeans that don’t make your butt look big). I also know that I like Oprah and I like the things for which she stands, even if maybe deep down what she stands for is Oprah. Still, in a world where everyone wants to be famous so they can be rich, you have to like a show that makes people famous for being good. As a show, it fits right in with ABC’s line-up, especially the weepy Extreme Makeover: Home Edition. Oprah doesn’t make “mild successes.” Expected the Big Give to be a mammoth hit.
Odds of survival: 3:2
Read the complete ABC press release at The Futon Critic.
Tags: ABC, The Industry, Upfronts
