“The Hills” — No More Mr. Nice Guy
Right off the bat Lauren tells a newly coiffed Brody that she hasn’t been on a “real date” in three weeks. Three weeks? Hey Lauren, codependent much? Not to get all Psych 101 here, but perhaps the reason none of the people on this show have any type of discernible personality is due to the fact that they simply refuse to spend time alone. Not that they should be balled up in the corner with a box of Mallomars and a shotgun, but seriously what kind of person could you possibly become when your every waking moment is spent in the company of people who also are without personality. Of course this is coming from a guy whose entire life has been built around the consumption of media so maybe I’m not the person to cast stones. WOW. This got real depressing. More after the jump!
In less sociological news the new Elodie is hired at Bolthouse. Her name is Kim. She and Heidi have to work together on some sort of NASCAR event. For more proof that Heidi was the correct choice for the job over the departed, but awesome, Elodie, while making small talk she says to Kim, “Has it been a world wind?” Yes, Heidi, a world wind. Advantage: Elodie.
For what seems to be the eightieth week in a row we were treated to yet another chapter in the “Heidi has to work and Spencer doesn’t understand why” book of complete and utter nonsense. In her best moment she shuts up his incessant whining and selfish couch-sitting by walking out the door uttering the classic and time-tested line, “I’ll be at work. Why don’t you try it.” Spencer, picking up his teeth off the floor responds with a meager, “Oh, it’s like that?” Yes, it is.
Late in the episode he does a pop-in at the Bolthouse offices to take Heidi to lunch. When she can’t go he doesn’t so much freak out and pouts a little and looks, generally speaking, douchey. Enough already with the Spencer nonsense. It seems so late in the game at this point his entire existence has gone from super-villain to punchline and now rests solidly as “boil on the ass of society.” Let’s speed up the resolution a bit, Hills producers. The collective American television consciousness simply can’t withstand many more appearances by Spencer.
On the LC side of things the week’s drama came from her meeting and dating Gavin who she ran into at a photo shoot. Gavin appears to be a normal, human male and not one of the idiot beach dudes the ladies are normally seen with. Of course this means the two will never work out. Lauren is absolutely incapable of dating, or even being near, anyone who isn’t built like brick shit house, cheesy as hell or being recently released from prison.
The thing is the problem isn’t so much Gavin, who she finds incredibly friendly, as it is Brody’s insistence that despite Gavin’s good-natured charm he isn’t right for her. Hrmm, I wonder who he thinks might be a better fit? I bet the person’s name rhymes with “grody.”
Lauren and Gavin went out on a date to some trendy sushi place. They got the baked salmon roll but perhaps should have gotten an eel roll because according to Lauren the date had no sparks. (Zzzzzzing!) She calls Brody after the date and asks him over to watch a movie. Gavin, presumably, goes back to his life of looking coquettish in front of cameras.
October 24th, 2007 at 5:50 am
excellent analysis! I missed the “world wind” but wow, just wow. Did you know that every monday me, kevin, paul (not your paul, but paul f.), and sometimes a few of the other regulars from my HS life all sit on google chat and watch this show together to make fun of everyone? you should try it sometime, makes it much more bearable.