MagneticMediaFed

I’m trying to adjust to a new work schedule and so my daily television regiment has been thrown for a loop. (Eight to five? Have to wear a tie? What kind of madness is this?) And since I currently don’t own an actual set and have to wait for content to be loaded online I’ve been at least a day behind on everything. That being said, I wanted to make sure I hit a few points before the weekend:

• Gossip Girl — OMFG. There are cliffhangers, and then there are CLIFFHANGERS. In a way I’m surprised this wasn’t the season finale, but I’m also completely relieved. Since the strike-break, this show has gone from being more or less awesome to unquestionably fantastic.
• Reaper — Speaking of a post-strike resurgence, this show has completely solved its problem with being wildly inconsistent (and sadly predictable) in terms of storytelling and it doesn’t hurt that its also funnier than its ever been.
• Top Chef — Love Stephaine. Love Richard (which is odd since I used to hate Richard… though I still find his hair objectionable on every level. Love Andrew. Like Spike. Like Antonia. Dale? Well Dale is in a gotsa-go situation. I mean Jesus Christ man, RELAX!
• 30 Rock — The Jack in Washington plot line was perhaps the funniest thing that show has ever done. (The rest of the episode wasn’t so bad either.) “It’s not a leak, you can see the report.”

Diabolical!

I can’t think of a character on a major network television series initially established as being so sweet but ultimately being so evil. I’ve seen the opposite. HRG on Heroes comes to mind. But Jenny Humphrey’s free-fall from poor teenage decision-maker to ruthless seaword feels unprecedented, and puts a mainstream, mostly teenage audience in the position of not having black and white lines drawn for whom we should be rooting. While watching this week’s episode I think I switched allegiances three or four times before ultimately just siding with mutual-assured destruction — ethically dubious, perhaps, but way more fun.

I should also note that seeing this show, the first time since leaving New York, I was reminded of words I used to live by: Not going to Butter is way better than going to Butter.

Amen!

I suppose this is a post reminding everyone that Gossip Girl returns to The CW tonight for a string of new post-strike episodes beginning at the startlingly early time-slot of 8PM. Tonight we’ll presumably see: Dan and S get into some sort of fight that will be resolved in about 45 minutes; Jenny continue to fall down the social rabbit hole; Chuck do something manipulative; Nate act boring; Rufus act a little mid-life-crisis-y. I also predict someone will get a critical piece of information via text-message.

But that’s a lie, the real reason for this post is just so we can all gawk at the above advertisement one more time. I know we’re in a recession, but whoever designed that ad needs a serious bonus. The not-quite-as-cool video ads after the jump…

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Look everyone! It’s Carter Baizen

This is the second time Carter Baizen has reared his ugly(?) mug in Nate’s life. The first time was during Chuck’s card game from a handful of episodes ago. There, his appearance was mostly invisible and entirely forgettable (I found out on TV.com). This time though he couldn’t be missed — at least by me — because his name was said constantly. Carter Baizen! Carter Baizen! Over there, in the foyer, Carter Baizen! This isn’t really of any specific concern to the masses unless you happen to be a die-hard How I Met Your Mother fan and know that one of its co-creators is named “Carter Bays” (who happened to write for The Late Show when I interned there). So when I hear Carter Baizen (which sounds a lot like “Bays” when said aloud) that is immediately what my mind goes to. I suspect I’m one of maybe fifteen people who has this problem (including Carter himself, I’d assume). Anyway, the goods after the jump…

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Mmmmmm… pie.

Now, there is nothing funny intrinsically funny about eating disorders, but the sight of Blair grabbing that enormous apple pie was hilarious. That she did so after being more or less dared by her mother makes everything that much more ridiculous and by extension awesome. I hate to be crass but there is an unmistakable comedic brilliance in anyone holding a giant pie with a pouty face. The following binge/montage (including the knowing-look from the kind Russian maid) was so over-the-top it was hard not to smile at this poor girl’s struggle. More after the jump…

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Better to burn out or to fade away?

This thing is killing me. We all knew the writers’ strike was going to be a major inconvenience, but I never suspected it would have the effect it’s currently having on my psyche. Ever since the writers took to the picket line three weeks ago, television has kind of sucked, and not just because my beloved late-night shows immediately went into reruns. Despite the fact that we’ve still been getting new scripted episodes these past few weeks, the strike has, in a way, highlighted just how solidly mediocre this fall has been. The new series, while marked by very few cancellations (honestly, who would have thought Cavemen would still be airing new episodes three weeks into November?), have generated no significant hits (with the exception of Samantha Who?, but it’s hard to say if it is the show that is successful or its Dancing With the Stars lead-in) while our favorite returning series from years past have either been wildly inconsistent (How I Met Your Mother), shockingly awful (Weeds) or just kind of a mess (Friday Night Lights). To top it all off the two series that have been consistantly good and occasionally great in The Office and 30 Rock are the first to run out of episodes. The whole mess can put your average television viewer into something of an existential conundrum: if interesting stories can vanish as quickly as they appear, what’s the point of it all? More after the jump…

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Wow, that is so embarrassing for you.

Here’s a life lesson for all of us: while Guitar Hero is extremely cool, and girls who play Guitar Hero instantaneously become four times more attractive (that number shoots to eight if it’s a real guitar), and performing admirably on “Free Bird” at the expert setting is certainly cool in and of itself and reason for boasting, and having Guitar Hero set up at a Super Sweet Seventeen party is a nice touch… while all of this is true we should never overlook the fact that no one (NO ONE!) looks cool playing Guitar Hero. It is physically impossible, because no matter how hard you are rocking all anyone sees is some idiot prancing around with a tiny plastic guitar strapped to their stomach, and not even the hotness of Serena van der Woodsen can make us forget this. More after the jump…

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“I have a very popular television name.

If motivation is the basis for all good drama, then Chuck is by far the most interesting character in the Gossip Girl world of wealthy teenage tomfoolery. While everyone else bumps around aimlessly, making mountains of molehills, Chuck knows what he wants and is willing to do whatever he can to get it. It also doesn’t hurt that he’s completely self-destructive. Self-destruction also happens to make great drama. More after the jump…

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It’s been a month since new shows started popping up and my god has it been a rough ride. I was able to keep for the better part of two weeks, but lately I’ve had to throw my hands up and declare that once again, the television has won. Part of the problem, for me at least, is this fall seems to have more decent shows than season’s past. There are always one or two really good new programs, but typically the rest of it is just dreck. This year there have only been a small handful of shows I would consider abdominal, but with an unusually large amount resting somewhere in the middle. But how does one justify sticking with a series that is at its very best just OK. I think now would be as good a time as any to look at where we are and decide how to move forward.

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“Vanessa From Queens

Honestly, she might not be from Queens at all, but how often can one tie in a Malkmus song to an episode of Gossip Girl? (Actually, I don’t know the answer to this either as I’ve never really thought much about linking the two. Perhaps its easier than imagined. This might make a fun game for those of you at home.) Either way, Vanessa is here and she’s intent on shaking things up in that quaint berg known as the UES — so long as the shake-ups don’t last for more than one hour (or 43 minutes after you account for commercials). More after the jump…

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White Men Can’t Dress

Being rich and powerful can get you a lot of things. It can get you into the school of your choosing. I can get you tickets to your favorite events. It can buy you an awesome apartment in a cool part of town. Though it can’t make you not look like an ass while going to play basketball off Houston and Christie Streets in SoHo. Sorry Charlie, but no one looks good in a blue and yellow sleeveless jersey-shirt and matching headband. No one. Not Lebron, not Tony Parker and certainly not your curiously lumpy frame. More after the jump…

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You wanna rumble, B?

My god this cast is good-looking. I mean, there have been some good-looking casts in television’s long, fabulous history. Actually, you’d be hard pressed to find a series whose cast isn’t at least marginally attractive (though I think a critic once gave that distinction to Homicide)? But there’s attractive and then there’s Gossip Girl whose main characters reach Lakshmi-levels of gorgeousness. Does that make it a better show? Not really, but it certainly doesn’t hurt (especially given the subject matter). More after the jump…

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“But it’s not just your Han Solo jacket that I like…

With the amount of television I have been watching over the past week I was beginning to feel like I lost sight of what separated a good show from a show that was just OK. Gossip Girl was quick to remind me. A good show is painless. A good show captures your attention as opposed to fighting for your attention. Two minutes into this week’s episode (and two hours since I sat down to hammer through a night’s worth of DVR’d programming) I was completely transfixed. Perhaps it’s the writing. No, of course it’s the writing. For a show chalk full of high school archetypes (though insanely rich and privileged ones) I’m shocked at how natural all of the dialogue sounds. Or maybe it’s the cast. This cast oozes charm like the Valdez. Whatever it is I pray it doesn’t change. More after the jump…

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My dear, you look absolutely perplexed.

It just doesn’t seem to end, does it? Tonight three new shows are premiering, along with new episodes from a couple gems from last week… and Top Chef. It’s OK. Sleep is overrated.

Bionic Woman — NBC 9:00pm
A so-so remake of a cheesy show about a robot-woman not called Small Wonder, though I haven’t seen the reworked pilot. I can guarantee lots of robot-woman fighting, if that’s your thing.

Life — NBC 10:00pm
Honestly, I know very little of this show. I know it’s about a guy who was wrongly imprisoned and then joins the police force. I’ve also heard the pilot is quite good.

Private Practice — ABC 9:00pm
It’s the Grey’s Anatomy spinoff. I won’t be watching (thank god!), though I assume many will. Let me know how it is.

Dirty Sexy Money — ABC 10:00pm
I really liked this show. It’s funny, has the always awesome Peter Krause, is briskly paced and kind of reminds me of a dramatic version of Arrested Development. That being said most the hour is dedicated to exposition, so who knows where it goes. Still, it’s the most interesting hour of the night.

Let’s also not forget we have new episodes of the awesome Kid Nation (8:00pm CBS) and Gossip Girl (9:00pm CW) as well as the (pen?)ultimate Top Chef.

Good luck!

Wow! Look at all of those gorgeous people!

How did this happen? How did a 27-year-old, heterosexual, baseball and Nintendo DS fan with a receding hairline and an unhealthy love of guitar solos turn into a giggly fourteen-year-old girl? There has to be an explanation. Why else would this individual be as inexplicably wowed by the new CW soap Gossip Girl (which kicks off tonight at 9pm following Top Model) as he is? It doesn’t make any sense. And yet it’s true. More after the jump…

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