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Dude, don’t leave a bro hanging… even for Mandy Moore.

We don’t usually tune in to three-camera sitcoms for unmitigated truth, and yet last night when I pulled up the season premiere of How I Met Your Mother I was treated to nothing but. There is an emotional honesty to this show that you simply don’t find in many comedies these days. The Office has it, but that’s also what they’re selling. HIMYM is far slyer about it mixing large levels silliness into the mix so that we never forget we’re watching a comedy, not an after-school-special. More after the jump…

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Here’s the big question: was Kid Nation, CBS’s new reality show where 40 kids ages 8-15 are asked to live in an abandoned ghost town and form their own society, what you were expecting when all was said and done? For me, it basically delivered on all fronts. Look, anyone who was expecting Piggy’s head on a pike clearly wasn’t paying attention to the network, the timeslot and the promos. Even those arguments a few months back about child labor laws being bent now seem silly having finally watched the show. And yes, there is a level of exploitation here, but that’s what reality TV is. If anyone is to be blamed it should probably be the parents who signed the forms. That being said, if I were 10 years old, I’ve LOVE to do this. More after the jump…

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Tonight is the night, friends. Everyone’s favorite not-screened-for-critics new fall show will be broadcast tonight at 8:00pm on CBS. I don’t want to psych myself up too much, but I’m basically counting on this being the single greatest achievement in television history. The list looks like this: 1) The Wire and The Sopranos, 2) Armstrong on the moon, 3) the Cheers finale, 4) Kid Nation. It’ll be way cool and for at least this week should be the focus of all television based water cooler conversations Thursday morning.

The New York Times published a story about how the new CBS reality show Kid Nation was warned by the New Mexico attorney general about possible violations in the state’s child labor laws. It’s best to just read the article as the legalese can get a little thick, but suffice to say this is the best paragraph:

…the parent of one child in the production complained to state officials that the children’s treatment bordered on abuse. Four children received medical treatment for accidentally drinking bleach, one child was burned on her face with hot grease while cooking in an unsupervised kitchen, and most of the children were required to work 14 hours or longer per day. They received a payment of $5,000 for their participation.

This show is going to be THE BEST.

Ah, CBS. It’s a network full of hit shows that no one particularly cares about. For “the eye” the name of the game this fall is to develop a crop of shows that people will actually talk about, not just watch in a semi-comatose state. To do this the network has picked up five new series they hope to be the text book definition of buzzworthy (actually, I’d love to see a text book that had a definition of ‘buzzworthy.’ Maybe I could develop a show around that premise!). Unfortunately, of those five only three were provided in their entirety and none of the three were particularly show-stopping (well, maybe one) or worthy of buzz. The full scoop after the jump…

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We’re dogs, but we talk like people… REAL people

I’ve been getting e-mails about this show from CBS for what seems like months. It wasn’t until a week or so ago that I actually took the time to figure out what exactly they were going to be putting on the air.

The show, in short, is a british import, animated by the great Aardman studio (responsible for “Wallace and Grommit,” “Chicken Run,” et al) and is nothing more than interviews with actual Americans covering a wide variety of topics and then animated with animals that have big googly eyes, lips and teeth. More after the break…

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Wait for it…

Most of us HIMYM die-hards had suspected that Ted and Robin were going to have been broken up by the time of the wedding, but the writers did an excellent job of throwing us off their trail. After all, this is a show about how the story is told almost as much as it is a about the story itself. More after the break…

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As the network upfronts are set to get underway, information has started to leak, and minds can be put at ease. Take for example this bit of news: Friday Night Lights is going to get a second season. In an unofficial announcement by NBC, the network has given the go-ahead to the brilliant series as well as early word on four other dramas that will be making the fall schedule (The Bionic Woman, Chuck, Journeyman and Life).

Last month NBC went ahead and ordered six new scripts for Nights, a sign things looked promising. Looks like the writers are now slightly ahead of the game.

Now we’re just holding out hope for Veronica Mars and How I Met Your Mother. Is it possible we score a hat trick?

“Variety” reports more on the NBC pickup.

Honestly, who doesn’t love this show? Oh, that’s right, Les Moonves doesn’t love this show (robot!). Too bad it’s his finger on the button.

Quick sidebar: It seems stupid to root against an entire network. Root against shows, or for shows, or against or for personalities, but a network is just so big and faceless its kind of hard to hold a grudge against it. Well, I actively root against CBS. I root against them because its an entire network based on diluting the television landscape with the most mediocre, safe programming imaginable — and I’m talking about network television which is suppose to have mediocre programming.

Honestly CBS, how many crime shows is too many crime shows? Allow me to list them to better illustrate my point: CSI, CSI: Miami, CSI: New York, Cold Case, Without A Trace, NCIS, The Unit, Numb3rs, Criminal Minds, and maybe even Ghost Whisperer, which may or may not involve crime… and ghosts. It’s just so sickeningly boring, and as a television viewer I actually find it kind of insulting that I’m being sold the same program a dozen different ways and expected to thank them for the pleasure. I continue to bitch and moan after the break…

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Just read me the news, dammit!
A recent Gallup poll shows that one-third of Americans have a negative view of Katie Couric, anchor of the CBS Evening News. I suppose it’s hard to get ratings when people simply don’t like you. Her competition, Brian Williams at NBC and Charles Gibson at ABC has much lower negative ratings and were more or less tied in likeability (and in ratings).
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They would just talk and talk and talk…
Gilmore Girls, the long running, quick-talking drama that began airing seven years ago on the WB, has been cancelled by the CW. This news should come as a surprise to few as the departure of the series creator last spring (and more important the dwindling audience) more or less left the writing on the wall. Given the performance of most of the CW’s line-up this year, it’ll be interesting to see if the network renews anything at all.
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Read more?

I gazed upon the glory of The Price Is Right, and I see the face of America — and it is devine!

My favorite new school/old school hybrid comedy returned last night (thank God for sweeps, right?) with yet another dynamite entry in what has shaped up to be a fantastic season.

The big story would probably be the hilarious last three minutes when we get to see Barney on The Price Is Right guessing retail prices with shift-manager precision and winning the showcase showdown. AND YET! I’m going to forgo those compliments to instead talk about how an 8:00 comedy on CBS was able to sneak a “road-head” joke into its first two minutes. Really, “sneak” is the wrong word to use here as the joke was blatant and kind of in your face (pun intended). But funny? Of course!

Look, Sunday night I watched a television show on HBO in which a young man took a dump in a shower, so this is hardly a question of being prudish. When you see a fairly risqué scene on broadcast television, however, it almost feels like you’re 12 again trying to make out nudity on scrambled cable. It’s the idea that someone somewhere was able to get something past the filter. In a way you it gives you hope for humanity.

The other curious subplot involved Lily trying to gain 5 pounds so that she could fit into her wedding dress. To do this she starts binging on junk food and yet doesn’t gain an ounce. Kind of funny though not hilarious. What struck me was what a curious feminist statement it may or may not have been. It simultaneously advocated not being this as a rail, and yet did so using an actress who is as thin as a rail. Kind of odd. The fact that in the end she can only put on the weight when eating with her true love is obviously adorable nonetheless.

May sweeps, the period in which network television tries to pull out all the stops in an attempt to skewer their ratings higher so they can charge more for advertising, started last Thursday, April 26th. Why Thursday? I’m not entirely sure, but would imagine it is due to the desire to keep the four week period clear of Memorial Day weekend, where the only people watching televsion are fans of mid-round NBA playoffs and losers like me. Sweeps concludes on Wednesday, May 23rd.

The good news is that all of your favorite shows (and even more of your least favorite shows) will be brand spankin’ new, complete with didn’t-see-that-coming twists and turns as well as celebrity cameos, shocking allegations, animals, trick photography and CG talking appliances. In other words, all the reasons in the world to avoid enjoying the outdoors for these few weeks when the weather isn’t suppose to be rainy or so hot you’re convinced you just might take home the pot in your Apocalypse is Nigh pool at work.

Here’s what I’m looking forward to watching:

• Seeing whether those crazy S.O.B.s over there at Lost can actually pull off the unimaginable: making some sense of this sometimes maddening season.
• Enjoying Heroes a few more times before it joins Lost in the category of shows that fell victim to second season frustrations.
• Jordin or Melinda?
• There are still more episodes of How I Met Your Mother, right? Seriously, that show has been especially MIA these past few months.
• Tony Soprano gets wacked or joins the witness protection program or retires to Vermont or god-forbid just goes on with his life as we’re left holding the cable bill

What are you anxious for? Or perhaps the better question would be, are you just anxious for the season to be over all ready?

Mark your calendars!

I’m watching the Edie Falco last night on The Late Show, and Dave is asking her about the end of The Sopranos. He asks, “Is there a chance you could get wacked?” She starts to respond when a sandbag falls from the sky and lands on Dave’s desk.

Assuming that the joke was about someone trying to bump off her or Dave, I guess it succeeded as it’s of what I immediately thought. The same is likely untrue for Ms. Falco who seemed legitimately shook up.

In fact from this point on the interview seemed spliced together from what I have to assume was a greater conversation on the gag itself. There were all sorts of uncomfortable edit points and conversation changes and all further questions were directed toward a visibly shaken Edie Falco. She kept rubbing her arms across the arms of the chair as if she was an Olympic downhill skier getting ready to launch out of the shoot.

Very awkward, though way more interesting than most throw-away gags have any right of being.

Listen to “The Fallen” by Franz Ferdinand

How I Met Your Mother seems to have pulled a Family Matters this season. Somewhere along the way the creators decided their main cast is good, but it’s Barney that puts the asses in the seats. The same thing happened during the first season of Family Matters when the writers picked up on the fact that the audience was responding to Urkel way more than they were responding to anyone else on the series.

Of course, that’s where the similarities end.

Either way Barney has turned into the main character, so it’s no surprise that an episode called “Bachelor Party” is going to be 99% Barney-fueled. Though I found the non-Barney action to be the highlights — especially the two random dudes who filled out the party: the guy who speaks only in clichés was great and should remind everyone of at least 30 different people in their life.

The other side of the episode featured Robin and Lilly in what can only be described as the longest d!ldo joke ever to air on network television (oh, and the length is in reference to the JOKE, not the D!LDO) — What’s in the box!!.

The ending, (further affirmation that Barney is the new lead) seemed slightly out of character (at least in terms of his reasoning), though was undoubtedly sweet.

According to the Associated Press, David Letterman went home sick today after coming down with a stomach bug. Adam Sandler, who was suppose to be tonight’s guest got a quick promotion to host.

Since coming to CBS in 1993, Letterman has had a string of guest hosts twice. First when he had his heart surgery in 2000 and then a few years later when he came down with a case of shingles. Tonight will mark the first time he simply got sick and couldn’t go on the air.

The Late Show does double tapings on Monday so he’ll be back on the air Wednesday night. Thursday and Friday’s shows are pre-empted by college basketball.

Read Bill Carter’s story over at the Times