MagneticMediaFed

The gang finds god.

I think Homer Simpson said it best this summer as he frantically flipped through the Bible saying, “This book doesn’t have any answers!” Perhaps the Bible should have been written more like the Bonanza City Journal, as that book seems chalk full of suggestions kids are more than willing to go along with. In short, they were told that the kids needed to find god and that perhaps they should hold a service — because in the history of modern civilizations, religion has never complicated things. More after the jump…

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Ha, ha! Everyone hates yous!

We’re eight days in and all the kids seem to still be alive. Jared is still phrasing things like he’s in a curse-free David Milch series, Taylor is still too precious, and council is still getting all of their information from a book that was apparently written by pioneers back in the 19th century. If this is true, those pioneers were idiots and wrote in a suspiciously perfect calligraphy. More after the jump…

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MURDERER! MURDERER!

Well, those crazy kids are at it again, and the book (the book!) not so gracefully guided them to a life and death decision — for a chicken. The kids, fed up eating mush for a week a straight, were told (by that damn book) it would be OK if they maybe wanted to kinda sorta kill one of their many chickens… to eat. Cue: PETA press-releases. More after the jump…

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My dear, you look absolutely perplexed.

It just doesn’t seem to end, does it? Tonight three new shows are premiering, along with new episodes from a couple gems from last week… and Top Chef. It’s OK. Sleep is overrated.

Bionic Woman — NBC 9:00pm
A so-so remake of a cheesy show about a robot-woman not called Small Wonder, though I haven’t seen the reworked pilot. I can guarantee lots of robot-woman fighting, if that’s your thing.

Life — NBC 10:00pm
Honestly, I know very little of this show. I know it’s about a guy who was wrongly imprisoned and then joins the police force. I’ve also heard the pilot is quite good.

Private Practice — ABC 9:00pm
It’s the Grey’s Anatomy spinoff. I won’t be watching (thank god!), though I assume many will. Let me know how it is.

Dirty Sexy Money — ABC 10:00pm
I really liked this show. It’s funny, has the always awesome Peter Krause, is briskly paced and kind of reminds me of a dramatic version of Arrested Development. That being said most the hour is dedicated to exposition, so who knows where it goes. Still, it’s the most interesting hour of the night.

Let’s also not forget we have new episodes of the awesome Kid Nation (8:00pm CBS) and Gossip Girl (9:00pm CW) as well as the (pen?)ultimate Top Chef.

Good luck!

Here’s the big question: was Kid Nation, CBS’s new reality show where 40 kids ages 8-15 are asked to live in an abandoned ghost town and form their own society, what you were expecting when all was said and done? For me, it basically delivered on all fronts. Look, anyone who was expecting Piggy’s head on a pike clearly wasn’t paying attention to the network, the timeslot and the promos. Even those arguments a few months back about child labor laws being bent now seem silly having finally watched the show. And yes, there is a level of exploitation here, but that’s what reality TV is. If anyone is to be blamed it should probably be the parents who signed the forms. That being said, if I were 10 years old, I’ve LOVE to do this. More after the jump…

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Tonight is the night, friends. Everyone’s favorite not-screened-for-critics new fall show will be broadcast tonight at 8:00pm on CBS. I don’t want to psych myself up too much, but I’m basically counting on this being the single greatest achievement in television history. The list looks like this: 1) The Wire and The Sopranos, 2) Armstrong on the moon, 3) the Cheers finale, 4) Kid Nation. It’ll be way cool and for at least this week should be the focus of all television based water cooler conversations Thursday morning.